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Setting Goals: Turning Family Fantasies Into Reality

by Ohio State University Extension    

Have you ever dreamed about a family vacation, new furniture, spending more time together, or having more help around the house? If you have, continue reading to help make your fantasies a reality.

First, you'll need the whole family involved. Arrange a family meeting on a day and time when everyone can participate. The purpose of the meeting is to discuss individual and family goals.

Next, set some guidelines. Suggested guidelines for family meetings include:

• Begin and end on time
• Let each person speak uninterrupted
• Show respect for every opinion and idea
• Keep order so everyone is heard
• Keep written records of what is said and decided

Now you are ready to begin the process of setting goals using the following steps.

1. Brainstorm

Brainstorming is an unrestrained offering of ideas by all members. Members of the family should offer their fantasies to the group. No idea is too outrageous at this stage. Be sure to keep a list of all suggestions.

2. Review and examine all choices

Ask these questions about achieving each goal:

• Would it benefit the whole family?
• What effect would it have on each individual?
• How might it hinder the family?
• What needs to be done to achieve that dream?

Think of the consequences. Discuss the family values. Do the suggestions fit with what the family values? Try to keep an open mind and look at both the benefits and problems of each suggestion.

3. Decide

Begin by eliminating all suggestions that the family agrees do not meet the needs of the group. Write down the pros and cons of the remaining suggestions. Discuss the options and take a vote on which to tackle first. Majority rule applies. You now have a family goal.

4. Take action

A family goal is the start of turning a dream into a reality. Taking action to achieve it is the next step. Discussion is the place to begin. Consider the following:

• What needs to be done to achieve the goal? For example, if your goal is to turn the basement into a family room, list the things to be done: check space for design and electrical outlets; drywall; paint; carpet or tile floor; purchase furniture and decorations; and add additional recreational items.
• What can each member of the family do to contribute? Who can design the space, call an electrician, paint, help purchase furniture, or help raise the money for the project? Young children and teens may give up eating out, reduce their allowances, or skip movies to contribute.
• How long will it take to reach the goal? Can the goal be broken into little goals? It may be a five-year goal. The first year, paint and finish the walls. The second year, lay the carpet or floor tiles. The third year, purchase a couch and television set. The fourth year, purchase endtables and additional furniture. The fifth year, add additional recreation equipment, such as a stereo, card tables for board games or cards, and pillows to lay on the floor.
• Finally, post the family goal where each member will see it each day. On the refrigerator or in the bathroom is usually a good place. Also, post a sign where each member of the family can write what their contribution to the goal will be. To keep the family on track, hold a meeting every few weeks and discuss progress. It may be necessary to make minor adjustments at these times.

Working together to set and attain goals benefits all family members. Family members can learn to become:

• open to change;
• committed to shared decisions;
• skillful at resolving conflicts and differences;
• respectful of each others' ideas;
• more efficient workers;
• happier with their roles in the family.

The family will also share joy in the success of achieving the goal.

Prepared by

Susan Rocco
OSU Extension Agent
Family and Consumer Sciences
Stark/Summit County